We can be ashamed of ourselves when we have done something terrible, or when someone has done something terrible to us, we develop a feeling of shame of ourselves and hatred or resentment against others.
Either shame, hatred or guilt will keep hunting us like a ghost. It is a bad feeling which is always there, no matter how we try to ignore it. Sometimes people are ashamed of things that they should not be ashamed of, for example when we hurt or kill someone accidentally, so we must come to terms with reality, we must forgive ourselves and keep on living.
In order to heal ourselves of our shame we must forgive the person or disregard that situation that has caused our shame. We also have to forgive our selves. We have a life to live, shame won't let us live, it will be a constant accusation.
The first thing to consider is that we can not go back to the past to fix the wrongs affecting our present, we can not let those feelings hurt us anymore otherwise our wounds will grow and get worse.
The key to our healing is acceptance of whatever caused our shame, combined with forgiveness. When we can say it's okay, I don't want to think about this anymore, it is a thing of the past, it is just a wound that is healed and causes me now to be stronger, this will never happen again, I won't let this happen again, etc.., these affirmations of acceptance will give a sense of peace and will cause permanent healing.
if we are ashamed because we committed a sin, then God is the answer. We must confess our sin to a priest, with remorse for having offended God, in order to be healed by God.
The fruit of our reconciliation with God is peace and inner spiritual healing.
The Lord says:
Even though your shame accuses you...
Please come, and let's reason together," implores the LORD. "Even though your sins are like scarlet, they'll be white like snow. Though they're like crimson, they'll become like wool.
Don't be afraid, because you won't be ashamed; don't fear shame, for you won't be humiliated, because you will forget the disgrace of your youth.
I don't look at human appearances, I look straight into the heart. Furthermore, I look into the soul and see my light reflected as in a mirror when there is no guilt covering the soul with a cloud of sin. I am the lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world. It doesn't matter how big or offensive your sins are to me, I am prepared to forgive you when you come to me in humility and contrition. I remove your shame and leave your soul clean as if nothing had happened. When I forgive you, I forget your sins. And when I forgive you, you must also forgive your self and others, don't call back your past sins distrusting my mercy. You may always remember that you offended me, to keep yourself humble before me, but remember, I have forgiven you.
Let my peace reign in your heart, don't let the evil one accuse you anymore, I heal you.